A Few Pearls of Wisdom about Ad World Philosophy

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This is my 50th Marketing column. You may react to that momentous news by thinking: "Is that all? The boring fart has been wittering on forever and a day and never has anything to say. Enough already!" Or, as I would naturally hope: "Gosh! It seems only yesterday I read his utterly brilliant first piece - doesn't time fly when you're reading a fun column?". Or, most probable response of all: "Who gives a toss?"

That being the case, and as Peter Mandelson refused to commemorate my very nearly millennial anniversary by building even a tiny domelet outside the Groucho, I have decided to celebrate the event by handing this 50th column to others. To be precise, I have given it over …