Working on All the Aspects of Love Life

Article excerpt

QMy wife and I have been married for more than 40 years. We used to get on well but our sex life was sporadic.

When it did happen it was mutually satisfying and often she said we should do it more. Before and after menopause things changed.

My advances cause annoyance and I feel we will never make love again but the urge is very strong on my part. Is there a way I can suppress my sex drive to keep harmony?

AMuch of a shared life, not just our love life, needs to be negotiated.

Two people who share a life need to be flexible about their desires, preferences, choices, hopes, and goals so that two individuals can share a mutually rewarding and happy life together. When it doesn't work, one or both people will be unhappy.

Resentments can build, and those buried resentments and unmet expectations can fester over time and create larger problems than if they had been dealt with immediately.

Many people don't like to face sexual issues or deal with problems in their relationship right away.

Most people stick to the belief that if they are with their soul mate there shouldn't be any problems, passion should be hot and heavy all the time, never wane from how it is in the beginning, and the relationship should never take work; it should always flow easily, because, after all, you are each other's other half.

If you believe you shouldn't have problems if you are indeed with your atrue one and onlya then of course when you do feel friction or experience difficulty you'll feel an added (unwarranted however) sense of failure and intense stress. …