Connecting with Kids through Stories: Using Narratives to Facilitate Attachment in Adopted Children

By Denise B. Lacher; Todd Nichols et al. | Go to book overview

Chapter 7
Successful Child
Narratives

One gave you a talent, the other gave you aim.

A child who has been hurt in the past may behave in ways that drive parents crazy. Many challenging behaviors develop in order to help the child survive physically and emotionally in a neglectful, abusive environment and can be difficult to change. Some problem behaviors occur simply because the child lacks the basic skills of how to do life. Overwhelming emotions such as fear, anxiety, sadness, or anger instigate other behaviors.

The majority of parents contact our clinic because the child has extremely difficult behaviors. They have read book after book, attended workshops, sought the help of educators and professionals, and still the child has defeated every parenting strategy. They feel angry, frustrated, and defeated. Behaviors exhibited by a child with attachment issues go far beyond the bounds of developmentally normal problem behaviors. The narratives used in Family Attachment Narrative Therapy help children create new stories about who they are, what happened to them, and who they can be. New stories teach and guide new behavior (Cozolino 2002). Successful child narratives address the child’s behavior problems, giving the parents the relief they seek.


Section 1: The Purpose of Successful Child
Narratives

In the telling of successful child narratives, the parent’s goal is not to confront the child’s behavior but rather to use stories to support and encourage the child as she learns to control whether or not she behaves in a respectful, responsible way. Many problem behaviors can be

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Connecting with Kids through Stories: Using Narratives to Facilitate Attachment in Adopted Children
Table of contents

Table of contents

  • Title Page 3
  • Contents 5
  • Acknowledgments 8
  • Legacy of an Adopted Child 9
  • Introduction 11
  • Chapter 1 - The Inner Working Model 15
  • Chapter 2 - Putting the Pieces Together Discovering the Child’s Model 33
  • Chapter 3 - Narratives That Bond, Heal, and Teach 48
  • Chapter 4 - Claiming Narratives 65
  • Chapter 5 - Trauma Narratives 80
  • Chapter 6 - Developmental Narratives 96
  • Chapter 7 - Successful Child Narratives 112
  • Conclusion 129
  • Appendix A - Emdr 132
  • Appendix B - Story Construction Guide 133
  • References 135
  • Subject Index 139
  • Author Index 143
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