Ramification of Answer: Recognizes that along with needing facts, a child has varying degrees of feelings toward the adoption experience--feelings that it is safe
for the child to relate.
SUMMARYAdoptive parents do have unique challenges before them to understand the subtle issues in adoption that impact them and their children.
Parents demonstrate growing understanding of those issues as they
adapt coping styles in talking with their children about adoption. It is
also critical for parents to be aware of what their own feelings and concerns as it correlates with their relationship with their child.
|1. ||How has your life been impacted by the three core issues--loss, shame, rejection--discussed in this chapter?|
|2. ||What style of coping with adoption issues best describes you--denial, acknowledgment, insistence? Why?|
|3. ||How would you describe your most often used response in answering your
child's questions around adoption--authoritarian, chosen baby, glorifying, rational, reflecting?|
|4. ||Describe what dynamics might be found in an adoptive family who is in "the
child is the problem," stage of emotional/legal dissolution.|
|5. ||Describe what dynamics might be found in an adoptive family who is in "the
turning point" stage of emotional/legal dissolution.|
Sharon Kaplan Roszia and
Deborah Silverstein "The Seven Core Issues of
Adoption," workshop presented at the American Adoption Congress, April 1988.
Robert Anderson, Second Choices: Growing Up Adopted (Chesterfield, Mo.: Badger Press, 1993).
Merle Fossum quoted in
Lewis B. Smede, Shame and Grace: Healing the
Shame We Don't Deserve ( San Francisco: Harper and Row, 1993), 4.
Gershen Kaufman, quoted in ibid, 7.
H. D. Kirk, Looking Back, Looking Forward: An Adoptive Father's Sociological
Testament ( Indianapolis: Perspectives Press, 1995), 11-12.
D. Paddock, Affirmations for Conscious Living as Adoptive Families. (Highlands Ranch, Colo.: Families with a Difference, 1998), Web site: www.
David Brodzinsky and
Marshall Schechter, The Psychology of
Adoption ( New York: Oxford University Press, 1990), 19.
Brodzinsky quoted in
Jayne Schooler The Whole Life Adoption Book (Colorado Springs: Pinon Press, 1993), 118.
Questia, a part of Gale, Cengage Learning. www.questia.com
Book title: Telling the Truth to Your Adopted or Foster Child:Making Sense of the Past.
Contributors: Betsy Keefer - Author, Jayne E. Schooler - Author, Jack G. Kammer - Illustrator, Kristi Anne Kammer - Illustrator.
Publisher: Bergin & Garvey.
Place of publication: Westport, CT.
Publication year: 2000.
Page number: 85.
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