Personality Disorder Homophobes -- III: Passive-Aggressive Personality Disorder Homophobes
The homohatred in passive-aggressive homophobia is not the hostility of the homophobic patient who tried to bomb a woman's college because she believed that the women there programmed the computers to send out rays beamed at and meant to penetrate her vagina. Nor is it the hostility of homophobes who vocally accuse all gays of trying to recruit and seduce all straights in places ranging from the shower to the nursery room. It is, superficially at least, a more polite hostility than that. We do not see physical gay bashing. We do not hear crude jokes about or rude accusations hurled at gays and lesbians. We hear only indirect and refined attacks, indelicate points made delicately. For example, we hear pseudorational concerns such as the worry that gays and lesbians will tear the moral fabric of the nation apart by getting married and adopting children. Or we see gays and lesbians ignored in a courteous and subtle manner, as when a cooperative apartment building changed the locks on its front doors, simply forgetting to contact two gay men who were temporarily out of town, so that they came back from their trip to find themselves locked out -- baggage, pets, and all. In short, passive-aggressives install glass ceilings meant to keep gays and lesbians from rising up too far. But because the ceiling is glass, they are able, when gays and lesbians protest, to point up and say, "But you see, there is nothing there."
This "rational," subtle, and indirect hostility is actually the most dangerous and destructive kind, because it is the most difficult kind to