How Can I Get over My Feelings of Lonliness? WAHT'S ON YOUR MIND?

Article excerpt

Byline: Raj Persaud

CONSULTANT psychiatrist Dr Raj Persaud answers your psychological problems EVEN though I have friends, I still feel very lonely at times. Why is this, and is there a cure?

S. White, Yeovil.

LONELY people do usually have some friends or acquaintances. But the main difference between them and everyone else is they are just more negative or pessimistic about the quality of their affiliations, particularly, perhaps, about deepening their relationships.

Hence, lonely people appear caught in a vicious cycle. Their pessimism about relationships leads them to avoid social opportunities, which then reduces their chances of improving their social skills, producing, over time, poorer social performance, leading to pessimism about relationships.

In particular it seems lonely people focus excessively on minor shortcomings in their social skills leading them to wrongly conclude that not only are they not liked, but that they never will be liked.

The cure for loneliness is to seek as many opportunities to meet as many people as possible, and do so with the open-minded attitude that there is no earthly reason your company cannot be as rewarding as anyone else's.

MY BOYFRIEND talks a lot in his sleep, sometimes quite loudly. He sleeps through it, but it wakes me up. Is there a treatment?

L. Patterson, Elstree.

SLEEPTALKING or somniloquy is quite common and is not thought to signify any significant psychological problems, but it can be socially embarrassing. …