Helping Children Cope with Divorce

Helping Children Cope with Divorce

Helping Children Cope with Divorce

Helping Children Cope with Divorce

Synopsis

"Dr. Teyber writes in the mature voice of a seasoned clinician, providing parents with not only his own observations, but a substantial amount of conclusive research regarding the effects of divorce on children, accompanied by realistic, age-appropriate advice for the whole family." _Child Magazine "Will be extremely helpful to any parent going through the process of divorce. It is conceptually sound, easy to read, and has important information for parents, professionals, and anyone who is working with children whose parents are going through divorce." _Hugh McIssac, LCSW, director, Family Court Services, The Superior Court, Los Angeles County "An outstanding book. It reinforces the value of putting children first and acknowledges children's need for both parents during and after the divorce. Teyber clearly describes the stress and pain children experience and explains how best to shield them from the parents' own conflicts. . . . Essential reading. . . ." _David L. Levy, Esq., president, Children's Rights Council "Dr. Teyber covers the importance of parenting sills [in offering] stability and continuity in critical stages of child development following a divorce." _Louis Welch, director, Child Custody Reform Project ". . . should be recommended reading for any parent going through a divorce. Teachers, counselors, therapists, family law judges, and attorneys will find Teyber's book a valuable adjunct to their work." _Benson Schaffer, L.A. County Superior Court (retired), Family Law Mediator Edward Teyber, Ph.D., is professor of psychology and director of the psychology clinic at California State University, San Bernardino. He received his M.A. and Ph.D. degrees in clinical psychology from Michigan State University. He is also the author of two counseling textbooks: Interpersonal Process in Psychotherapy: A Relational Approach and coauthor, with Faith McClure, of Casebook in Child and Adolescent Treatment: Cultural and Familial Contexts.

Excerpt

This book teaches divorcing parents what they can do to help their children successfully adjust to divorce. The biggest concern for almost all divorcing parents is whether their children will be hurt by the breakup. To be sure, divorce brings painful feelings that are not short-lived; divorce is difficult for every family member to deal with. Children do not understand the changes that are occurring and are worried about what will happen to them. And although parents are usually unaware of this, children also worry about the well-being of their parents, who now seem so angry and sad.

Regardless of who initiated the divorce, most parents are far more distressed by the breakup than they had anticipated. In addition to their own personal distress, they are burdened by guilt over the divorce and by feelings of inadequacy because they do not know how to help their children. However, these and other problems are resolvable. The widespread myth that children's lives are forever blighted is false; parents can take control of this crisis and do a great deal to help their children.

I will be your child's advocate in the pages ahead. I will communicate to you—the concerned parent—what your children may be thinking, feeling, and needing throughout the different stages of divorce. As I help you understand the questions and concerns that divorce evokes for your children, I will also provide practical . . .

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