Bachelors: The Psychology of Men Who Haven't Married

Bachelors: The Psychology of Men Who Haven't Married

Bachelors: The Psychology of Men Who Haven't Married

Bachelors: The Psychology of Men Who Haven't Married

Synopsis

In this book, Waehler describes bachelors' internal processes and interpersonal styles along a continuum with three specific bachelor types: Flexible, Entrenched, and Conflicted. Bachelors is the first and the only book to examine the inner workings of the bachelor mind. Waehler explores the psychology of never-married men and their choices, looking at similarities as well as differences. He looks at their conscious and unconscious psychological profiles, the experience within their families of origin, their relationships with women, their development through adulthood, and their beliefs about marriage. In the end, Waehler establishes patterns that lead to men maintaining their single status with varying degrees of satisfaction. He also provides practical advice on how to come to terms with various bachelor styles, or alternatively, how to successfully move from bachelorhood to marriage. Real life case studies are provided throughout, making this a book for the interested adult as well as researchers and other professionals.

Excerpt

"Old Bachelor" is a card game to replace "Old Maid." The Old Bachelor combs his hair over his bald spot, keeps his mother's picture on his dresser, and has a thick "little black book." He is more pitiable than attractive. The two Chicago-area women who produced the game were tired of the cliched Old Maid as an ugly, long-nosed, fearsome woman who makes you a loser if you get stuck with her. They created their bachelor image by surveying the prevailing attitudes about bachelors. Both games highlight the negative image of singleness, but the "Old Bachelor" version begins to even the score between the sexes by drawing on some of the deeply rooted and popularly held views of bachelors. Are these beliefs reasonable? To what extent does their characterization accurately reflect the true bachelor nature?

First let's clarify what is meant by the term bachelor in this psychological inquiry: Bachelors are heterosexual men who are at least age 40 and have never married. Some descriptions use less stringent criteria for qualifying bachelors and include any man not currently married. For instance, divorced or separated men are sometimes considered bachelors instead of being more accurately described as single men. Other observers do not consider sexual orientation and include homosexual men in the bachelor ranks. Age must also be a criterion for defining someone as a bachelor: No one . . .

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