Academic journal article Annals of Psychotherapy and Integrative Health

Memo to Heart

Academic journal article Annals of Psychotherapy and Integrative Health

Memo to Heart

Article excerpt

It is so exhausting, some days, to hold onto everything that needs to stay organized. You feel that if you fall behind, something catastrophic will happen.

Something catastrophic has already happened anyway, though: You are exhausted. You aren't enjoying anything. Even things you used to consider fun aren't anymore because when you finally get to them, you're so very tired.

You're too tired to work. Too tired to play. Too tired for exercise or yoga. Way too tired to investigate meditation, whatever that is, which you still haven't figured out, and which in any case is pretty far down on a list that has to include so many things calling for your attention that seem way more urgent. Too tired for urgency, though. Too tired.

Your legs are exhausted. Your shoulders ache. Your neck is tense. Your heart feels heavy.

So lie down. Watch your thoughts swirl around, as your mind seems to be the only unexhausted part of you right now. It's spinning pretty fast, actually. Your thoughts are spinning so fast, you feel as though you are going to lose your mind. Watch your mind. Watch your spinning thoughts. But close your eyes so you don't get dizzy. And let go of your mind. Lose your mind, whatever that means to you. Let go of trying to hold onto any sense of order in there. Here's how:

See your thoughts as flowers, or as leaves. Place them, one by one, in an imaginary river that is flowing away from you, right at eye level. Place each thought leaf in the river. Watch the thoughts flow away from you down the river, until they become so very small you can't see what they are, so small so that you can't see them anymore at all. …

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