Academic journal article Pre- and Peri-natal Psychology Journal

SHARING SPACE: Why I Wrote Love Letters before Birth and Beyond

Academic journal article Pre- and Peri-natal Psychology Journal

SHARING SPACE: Why I Wrote Love Letters before Birth and Beyond

Article excerpt

After originally writing Love Letters Before Birth and Beyond seventeen years ago, I tried to find a publisher for the collection. Although I received compliments on the writing, no one seemed to believe there was a market for them. Two years later, Thomas Verny published The Secret Life of the Unborn Child. I was delighted to have confirmation of my beliefs, but was too busy rearing a child to work on the book any more.

Now the book has come out into an environment that is far more receptive to the idea of a mother-child relationship before birth, thanks to people like Dr. Verny and so many other APPPAH members. However, it wasn't until just a few weeks ago that I realized why these letters were so important for me to write...and now, to have published.

Some friends and I were having a discussion about birth order and its effect on personality. This talk led me to share that I had had a brother whom I never had the chance to know because he died of a brain tumor at the age of four and a half. I explained that it wasn't until two years ago that I had finally done the arithmetic correctly and realized that he had died less than two years before I was born, and that I was born into a grieving family. This awareness explained the fact that, although I had always known I was loved, I had felt that, as a young child, I was held at arm's length. It also explained why my first memories of my parent's faces were of pain and sadness.

As I continued to unravel the timing of my birth, I realized that my mother conceived me within a year after my brother, Rickie, had died. …

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