Magazine article Nation's Cities Weekly

Conflict Resolution: Converting Negative into Positive

Magazine article Nation's Cities Weekly

Conflict Resolution: Converting Negative into Positive

Article excerpt

You get angry at, complain about and criticize others; and they do the same to you. You hear excuses, work with difficult people, and manipulate others, and they make excuses, consider you difficult, and also manipulate you. Sound familiar? This is called "Negative Stuff".

Rule One: Negative Stuff is subjective rather than objective. If you can think smart, work smart, and behave smart, you can scrape off that "Negative Stuff" on the bottom of your shoe. Once you convert that "Negative Stuff" into "The Positive" the more valuable and productive you become to your government, constituents, family and friends, and yourself.

The choice is yours:

Do you take a pessimistic approach and dwell on helplessness and hopelessness or one of optimism and behaving as a positive person? Here' is an example to illustrate the point: Someone says, "It's a beautiful day." The pessimist responds, "But it's supposed to rain tomorrow," while the optimist responds, "It certainly is!"

One solution is to stop decatastrophizing. Realistically consider the "What ifs." First, list the worse case scenario asking, "How likely is this to happen?" Then list the best case scenario. Finally, ask, "what's the most likely outcome that will actually occur?"

Give yourself a check up from the neck up: Are you a positive person? Are you sure? Do you laugh? Do you socialize with positive people? Do you pay compliments or "catch people being good?" And for your million dollar question: How likely are you to resolve the conflict by saying, "We've had difficulties in the past. …

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