Magazine article New Statesman (1996)

Tactical Briefing

Magazine article New Statesman (1996)

Tactical Briefing

Article excerpt

From: The Unit

To: GB

Subject: Anniversary

* So, pretty good week. The anniversary is here! Time for you to hang out the bunting. May be time for us here, who have been working so hard on your media profile and day-to-day political tactics all year, to cut ourselves a slice of cake and, just for a minute, put our feet up and give ourselves a jolly good pat on the back for a job basically in many ways well done.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

* For aye, the naysayers can say nay and the doom-mongers can monger doom and the knockers may knock and the attack dogs can dog-attack, but still, here we stand, a year on. Battered? Yes. Bruised? Perhaps. Mortally wounded? Aye, that too, if you insist. But still standing proud, like a fine tree which-though infected with a deadly tree virus spreading inexorably through its sapstands proud and true and tall in the forest as a testament to, if nothing else, its own existence.

* So, let us count our blessings. And while it would be folly not to track the ever-growing number of mortal enemies/close political allies who have detailed plans for your downfall, let us not be obsessive in that tracking. Let us take time to smell the flowers of office. Relish the desks. The stationery. The free cars and myriad other general great stuff which it is our honour and duty to have and use while we are in office. Plus, of course, the massive (but rather cool) burden of final responsibility over the nuclear arsenal. …

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