Magazine article Marketing

Supermarkets Put Cash before Basic Questions

Magazine article Marketing

Supermarkets Put Cash before Basic Questions

Article excerpt

Have you ever felt ashamed at being attracted to some gruesome sight despite yourself? Road accidents, for example, always draw horrified yet fascinated onlookers. I know this from personal experience: at 18 I was run over and nearly died. Indeed, I was an object of medical curiosity as the first person in the north of England known to survive a ruptured liver. I recall feeling oppressed by the circle of gawpers pressing in.

I am often drawn in an analogous way to the antics of meretricious entertainers with an engaging way of saying nothing in particular. Jimmy Saville was one. Chris Evans is another. Not long ago he mentioned a glorious invention which can only hearten those of us who believe progress is still possible in this wicked world. The breakthrough in question is the polypropylene artificial testicle for dogs, or rather, since these things tend to come in pairs, polypropylene artificial testicles. They have been introduced in the US, of course - where life at its best and worst is to be seen - to assuage the post-operative trauma of male dogs who have had their own removed. It all reminds me of the touching joke: 'How many Country singers does it take to change a light bulb? Five. One to change the old one and four to sing about the one they lost.'

In an age when such marvels are possible, what can we say about our petty struggles in marketing? Take the great supermarket war, in which the antagonists, exhausted from struggling over their traditional turf, have sought to change the battleground, first launching competing schemes of bribery and now moving into things like banking. …

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