Magazine article The Advocate (The national gay & lesbian newsmagazine)

Pics and Tricks

Magazine article The Advocate (The national gay & lesbian newsmagazine)

Pics and Tricks

Article excerpt

Where's the trust when neither of you were supposed to be cruising online? Ethical expert STEPHEN MILIOTI explains.

Q: My boyfriend posted nude pictures of himself on a hookup site. We don't have an open arrangement, but if I tell him I saw the pics, I'll have to admit that I too had been on those sites, even though I've never hooked up with anyone. What do I do?

OK, you've seen your boyfriend on a sex site, and he appears to be, um, open to a good time. Here's what you do: Take a jog around the block before doing anything. Resist the urge to immediately slam him for the pictures. It'll be impossible for you to explain anyway, as he'll accuse you of going to the site for sex, even if you were just looking, as you claim. Or he'll accuse you of being stalkerish, which happened when I confronted a guy I was seeing after I found him advertising his goods online. I was expecting an apology and presents, but he called me a freak and ran away.

Over time, though, I realized I acted too quickly. …

Search by... Author
Show... All Results Primary Sources Peer-reviewed

Oops!

An unknown error has occurred. Please click the button below to reload the page. If the problem persists, please try again in a little while.