Magazine article New Statesman (1996)

Getting in Touch with My Real Voice Has Helped Me Come to Terms with My Sigourney Weaver Fixation

Magazine article New Statesman (1996)

Getting in Touch with My Real Voice Has Helped Me Come to Terms with My Sigourney Weaver Fixation

Article excerpt

I was having a normal Tuesday evening chat with Geoff in the Marquis of Cornwallis about such vital topics as whether Alan Green was a better commentator than Andy Gray, and how I could kick my persistent fascination with the moment in Alien when Sigourney Weaver slips her vest off, when Mike Levine sidled across and joined us.

On the face of it Levine should be good company. He runs an enterprising television company in Charlotte Street called Last Rights, which specialises in films about victims of terminal illness, and he has a fund of good stories about the way so many of his subjects spend their last moments not getting ready to meet their maker but negotiating repeat fees for a programme which, by definition, they won't be around to see.

But I've never felt quite comfortable in his company. Even as I sit listening to one of his compelling stories about the difficulties of filming inside a ventilation shaft for his much-praised series on Legionnaire's Disease, I find myself fighting a growing sense of unease.

"What were you two getting so animated about?" he wanted to know, as he slid his bottle of Hoegaarden between our pints of Pride.

Geoff did the honours. "Nothing much. Laurie was banging on about football commentators and Sigourney Weaver's knickers."

Levine nodded unenthusiastically and quickly steered the conversation round to his frustrating search for victims of Total Allergy Syndrome who were not averse to having their complete retreat from the material world filmed by a six-person camera crew.

It was only when he disappeared to the toilet that I realised how much my dislike was evident. "For Christ's sake," snapped Geoff. "Try to look a little more friendly. You've got a permanent sneer on your face. What have you got against him?"

I muttered something about his repulsive after-shave and the white polo neck T-shirts, but before I was halfway down the list Geoff was bounding in with the definitive explanation. …

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