Magazine article Management Today

Smoke & Mirrors

Magazine article Management Today

Smoke & Mirrors

Article excerpt

For once, things are going well at Smokehouse. How on earth did that happen?

MONDAY

As the great American president Harry Truman said, it's amazing what you can achieve when you let other people take the credit. That's actually the business model of most payday loan companies but I don't think that's what he meant. As communications director of Smokehouse, my job is basically to make sure we get all the credit and none of the blame.

Given that our business performance normally veers between heart-stopping close shaves and buttock-tightening near misses, this means I have a full-time job keeping the blame moving so fast it doesn't ever touch anyone's desk. But this week something has happened in the organisation so profoundly unsettling that I don't know whether to take the credit or accept the blame.

TUESDAY

Smokehouse, like every other damn company, is on a journey. Where we're heading has never been fully explained and when we get there it will probably turn out to be extremely unpleasant.

A bit like Brexit. But the great thing about being on a journey is you never have to bother too much about where you currently are. Except now In the board meeting yesterday, it was revealed that our IT was stable, customer complaints and associated litigation were well down, staff turnover had improved from haemorrhaging to clotting and, unbelievably, we made a slight profit in Q2. No one round the board table wanted to say anything in case we jinxed it, but I could see from everyone's faces that they were thinking exactly what I was thinking: something somewhere had gone right.

WEDNESDAY

The first thing we do after announcing some corporate catastrophe is to launch an internal inquiry. It's a very handy technique we've learned from the public sector. This has the double benefit of giving extra work to people in the office we don't like and allowing us to move the agenda on to more important things like bonuses and the colour of the boardroom carpet.

As something had gone right, it only seemed fair to launch another internal inquiry, if only to see whether things going right was actually the portent of something going very badly wrong. I also sensed that we had a very brief window of calm before the tsunami of credit-taking hit, with every department saying that they alone were responsible for our corporate return from the dead. …

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