Magazine article Management Today

Weak at the Top

Magazine article Management Today

Weak at the Top

Article excerpt

MONDAY

Sir Marcus has joined a cult. Shocked everyone at board meeting by saying he was deeply concerned with vision and values. Then introduced weird looking pony-tailed hippy who revealed to us that our people are our brand. Let's start selling them then, I suggested, because that's what you do with brands. Sir Marcus gave me his P45 look so I communicated internally for a while. Rasputin and his agency Breakout (they're called Breakout because by rights they should still be in prison for fraud) have proposed a total programme with vision and values, team building-workshops, and a colourful, easy-to-use, jargon-free binder all nicely branded Vision 2010. Sir Marcus then announced how much it all cost and while I was choking he added that as it was internal marketing it should come out of my marketing budget. Sodding Nora!! Had that part of the budget earmarked for Board team-building at Japanese Grand Prix.

TUESDAY

St Marcus (as Bill Peters now calls him] summoned me into his office again. There was a big poster on his wall with Breakout Values on it: CREATIVITY, EFFICIENCY, INTEGRITY, COURAGE, LEARNING. Rasputin said the people have to live the brand and its values and must all be involved. Then he added something like: 'Tell me and I forget; show me and I understand; involve me and I remember.' I told him with my team it's: 'Tell them and they forget; show them and they forget; involve them and they forget.' Got back to office and began wide-ranging staff focus groups to involve them in creation of vision and values, ie, asked Hayley when she brought in my coffee. She said more money, less work. Smart girl.

WEDNESDAY

Had long lunch with Bill Peters, who knows all about internal marketing, as he supplies half the company with cheap cigarettes. Told him about Rasputin and he volunteered to take him outside and have his balls for cufflinks. …

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