Magazine article The Spectator

The Public Know How These Attacks Happen - Unlike the Politicians

Magazine article The Spectator

The Public Know How These Attacks Happen - Unlike the Politicians

Article excerpt

'A l-Qa'eda brain surgeons fail to blow up large car full of petrol' has an agreeable ring to it, as a sort of taunt at our enemies and as a comfort blanket while we're standing in the mile-long queue at Heathrow with a sniffer-dog's snout in our groins. There is a certain truth to it, too -- and one not yet remarked upon, in public at least, perhaps for superstitious reasons: they're pretty useless, aren't they? And have been for some time, now. Useless either with cool, state-of-the-art plastic explosives on the Underground, cunning toothpaste tube bomblets at the airport or, the new cruder approach -- cars full of petrol to which they apparently forget to apply a cigarette lighter. Almost nothing they do works, usually as a result of their own incompetence and stupidity. Imagine: you join al-Qa'eda, take your medical exams, get a job in a British provincial hospital and spend years patiently plotting, awaiting the right moment and painstakingly growing your beard. An enormous investment of time, money and effort. And then you fill the car full of gasoline and propane and succeed only in setting yourself alight and incurring a few parking fines. Suicide bombers are, by definition, an evolutionary anomaly, a strictly counter-Darwinian development. Maybe the good gene pool has already been blown to smithereens and only the thickoes remain.

We may have been left with the jihadist equivalent of Norman Wisdom, squeaking 'Allah u-Akhbar, Mr Grimshaw!' shortly before being arrested near Sandbach.

Which I suppose is just as well, given our palpable confusion and double standards when faced with Islamist attacks on our soil.

The perpetrators may not have been British born and bred (can anyone explain why this was seen as 'good news'? ) and the car bomb itself a new, imported strategy -- but everything else about the events of last weekend was same ol', same ol' -- including the substance of the Prime Minister's response, even though he's a brand new Prime Minister.

We began with the usual and -- this time -- quite surreal assurances from politicians, Muslim leaders and, in particular the BBC, that the latest attacks were 'nothing to do with Islam'. This is what we always hear when a bomb has gone off, or failed to go off -- and it is always a silly statement, based upon nothing more real than wishful thinking and a quick, thoughtless, unnecessary genuflection towards crowd control. On this occasion, though, it was subtly undermined by one of the perpetrators, doused in flames outside Glasgow airport, screaming 'Allah!

Allah! Allah! Allah!' before being peremptorily battered by a passer-by. Also, they parked their car at a mosque -- and yet, according to every bigwig, policeman and community leader interviewed, this was a mere case of coincidence -- NCP being full at the time, presumably.

Then, as always happens, we had the next stage of wishful thinking. Led by the BBC's bizarrely pro-Islamist Frank Gardner, we were assured by assorted correspondents and politicians that Britain's Muslim community were, in their entirety, appalled and outraged by the attacks. Well, maybe they were -- but how do you know? Did you ask 'em, Frank? Don't forget that more than half of our Muslims feel sympathy for suicide bombers in Israel and a fairly hefty minority (one in eight, at the last count) for similar action against the cockroach imperialist infidel scum (i. e. you and me) over here. Not to mention almost half of Britain's Muslims who want Sharia law in this country and do not remotely, therefore, share our norms and values.

We are told these sorts of things in order to stop us coming to unpalatable conclusions, because the government still clings, ever more precariously, to the vestigial tail of that discredited ideology, multiculturalism.

Take, for example, the issue of immigration.

The aspirant, useless bombers who missed their targets at Glasgow and London came here from Iraq, Jordan, Saudi Arabia, Pakistan. …

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