Magazine article Working Mother

Get What You Want

Magazine article Working Mother

Get What You Want

Article excerpt

My 3-year-old is really good at asking for what he wants. "I want to fly," Jack says. "Throw me up in the air." He also expresses his needs easily: "I need more bubbles in my bath," or "I need to find Baby Holiday" (his favorite doll, named after Billie Holiday). And sometimes (sigh), "I need a hug."

Why does asking for what we want-and need-become so much more complicated when we're older? For some working moms, the hesitation to ask for what we want means we rarely reach out to our partner for help with our kids so that we can indulge in some "me" time. For others it can mean shying away from salary negotiations for fear of being judged as too aggressive.

In their book Women Don't Ask: Negotiation and the Gender Divide, Linda Babcock and Sara Laschever reveal that women are more pessimistic about how much is possible when negotiating compensation. Therefore, they typically ask for, and get, less than men. …

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