Magazine article New Internationalist

Wardrobe Malfunction

Magazine article New Internationalist

Wardrobe Malfunction

Article excerpt

Has anyone noticed singar Janet Jackson angrily eycballing her rubber-dad bosoms in her latest publicity photos? Not to mention furiously clutching said glands while screeching at them like naughty children playing up in the supermarket. Is this meant to be some sort of erotic self-love/ loathing? Or is she warning them not to repeat their most notable crime when one of them 'accidentally' fell out during a television special in front of millions? Or else the puppy gets it!

Faced with the ire of the American viewing public, who found the sight of a pierced mammary obscene, Jackson blamed it on a wardrobe malfunction.

Oh, how we laughed! I may never have had a breast 'accidentally' pop out of its own accord on telly (or accepted a grand award with one matronly bra-covered bazooka on show like one poor British presenter did when her strap slipped), but my wardrobe mistakes are usually low-level and regular.

The only injury I've sustained thus far is the big toe pushed out of shape through one evening's wear of a sensible pair of boots with a modest two-inch heel. Manufactured by every granny's favourite shoesmith (the one that gave us an X-ray machine on every High Street and irradiated the tootsies of an entire generation), it featured an unfortunate line of stitching across the bunion line. The leather softened with wear. The stitching remained as inflexible as a tinpot despot clinging to power.

I may as well have worn those cruel shoes my mother warned me against instead of tending my tender hooves with comfy flatties and practical workers' boots. …

Search by... Author
Show... All Results Primary Sources Peer-reviewed

Oops!

An unknown error has occurred. Please click the button below to reload the page. If the problem persists, please try again in a little while.