Magazine article The Spectator

What People Want

Magazine article The Spectator

What People Want

Article excerpt

New York

This is a very good time to be in the Bagel. The sun's out, the girls are walking around in their briefest, Central Park's blooming all over, and Miss Monica Lewinsky is on national television performing oral acrobatics as a presenter of a show called Mr Personality. No, I have not seen the freak show, and do not plan to. I assume it is pop culture at its ghastliest, Lewinsky being a typical product of our times, a woman who became a celebrity for performing oral sex on the artful draft dodger in the Oval Office. Some celebrity. Some dodger. Needless to say, the show is on the Fox network, where Mr Rupert Murdoch and his fellow neo-cons have stormed the culture from within and have lowered standards to their moral level. I'm told that Lewinsky has lost weight, which is like saying Bill Gates is getting poorer. Monica was, is and always will be a slob sans pareil, just as Bill Clinton will always be a draft-dodging phony liar par excellence. Lewinsky should never have been paid for her conversation - talking is redundant in what she excels at - but only for her silence. But maybe I'm being unfair. A girl's gotta make a living and all that, but why on national television? There used to be very nice places to enjoy the type of thing she became famous for, like chez Madame Claude's, at Rue Marignan, where it was called the goody, goody gumdrops room.

Never mind. Sex is what people want, and the networks are there to serve the public. The other night my friend Roffredo Gaetani, an ex-pro boxer, was telling us how Mike Tyson is a sensitive soul, and, although he gets carried away at times when in the company of the fairer sex, he has been known to cry while making love. `Yeah, sure,' said my daughter, `mace will always do that to one.' Tyson may have lost his boxing skills, but he's the biggest draw in the world because of his bad behaviour. …

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