Magazine article Times Educational Supplement

Family Must Come First to Ease Transition

Magazine article Times Educational Supplement

Family Must Come First to Ease Transition

Article excerpt

Parents can find sending their child to a special school challenging, so set out the facts clearly and ensure the right support is in place

I have worked in special education for 10 years. In that time, I have known two sets of parents who not only never visited their child's special school but didn't even know where it was. Reflect on how astounding that is for a minute.

The problem may be one of transition. Much time and effort is devoted to managing the pupil's move between school sectors, but how much thought is given to the emotional demands that this places on parents, particularly when the transition is from mainstream to special education?

I recently took my daughter to Moorfields Eye Hospital in London, as I do a couple of times a year for the tests and check-ups that her congenital condition demands. In the waiting room, I saw a few parents at the beginning of a journey we've been on as a family for a few years now. Two mothers were sitting next to me; one was carrying a baby with one eye and the other an infant with no eyes at all. A number of the other children present had obvious learning difficulties.

The lives of these parents will be punctuated by meetings with health, social care and education professionals, during which they will have to retell their story time after time. The natural daydreaming about the future that all parents indulge in will be constantly reassessed as they worry about the probability of their child leaving home, going to university and getting a job.

There can be grief associated with this and it must be borne in mind when meeting parents of children with learning difficulties. How often do we remember this as teachers? And when we do, how well do we manage it?

The consultant who informed us of our daughter's diagnosis must have thought me very rude as I constantly interrupted him with questions. The first one - "Does this condition have any learning difficulties associated with it?" - left my mouth almost before he had started talking.

He was exceptional; sensitive, a clear communicator and a good listener. He advised us brilliantly.

"It's your choice. In five minutes you'll meet with the surgeon. He is going to persuade you to operate. Surgeons love to operate, but the decision is yours. You've heard all the facts, so make up your own mind and stick to it."

He remains the model I aspire to when I meet with prospective parents at my school: we are there to advise, not to make decisions for them.

The personal touch

Parents typically visit us when their child is in the penultimate year of primary school. Sometimes they come a year earlier if they want to see a lot of schools or need to gather evidence for a local authority tribunal. Sometimes they visit when their child is in the last year of primary and they are in a tight corner having been turned away from a string of secondaries.

In all cases, I regard this meeting as the beginning of the transition process. We don't show groups around. All parents receive individual tours as they need the space and privacy to discuss their child. Sometimes they also need to offload prior experiences that have left an indelible mark on them.

I make it clear to parents that I'm not a salesman. I obviously want to show my school in the best light, but I've never met their child so I have no idea if we will fit the bill. I simply show them the whole school, from top to bottom. Like the doctor at Moorfields, I present the facts and leave the decision to them.

My students make a far better impression than I do. …

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