Magazine article Drug Topics

A Pharmacist's Tongue-in-Cheek Guide to Patient Etiquette

Magazine article Drug Topics

A Pharmacist's Tongue-in-Cheek Guide to Patient Etiquette

Article excerpt

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1. Be sure to stare at the pharmacist while your prescriptions are being filled. Staring at the pharmacist makes him or her work faster.

2. Never remember the name of the medications you want refilled. By calling it "the little white pill," you are sure to receive the correct medication.

3. When calling in eight prescriptions or more, always arrive at the pharmacy to pick them up within 10 minutes. It is OK to hurry pharmacists; if they make a mistake, it won't kill you or anything.

4. Feel free to ask the pharmacy staff for the exact price of your prescription before it is filled. The staff should know every co-pay for every insurance plan.

5. Always ask how long it will take to fill a prescription. If you're lucky, you will get it for free if it's not ready in 30 minutes or less. Also, be sure to keep asking if the prescription is ready every five minutes-- pharmacists often keep prescriptions to themselves after they are filled just to tick you off.

6. Be sure to complain about the co-pay. The co-pay is set on the whim of the pharmacist and has nothing to do with the insurance compaY

7. It is not necessary to present your insurance card-or even know the name of the company. Pharmacists are psychic and know everyone's insurance.

8. Pharmacies encourage forgery. When you pick up a prescription for someone else, please forge his name.

9. Upon calling in a refill for a maintenance medication without refills, always question why the doctor has to be called when you've taken the same medication for years. It is only a myth that prescription medications have to be ordered by doctors.

10. Always question why the insurance company is so concerned about your getting Prilosec 10 days too soon. After all you're paying $5.00 for it, and that's all it costs.

11. Over-the-counter displays are put there in order to entertain children. Please encourage them to play with any item and even open one or two.

12. Make sure you save all your old insurance cards. One of pharmacists' favorite games is to guess which one is current.

13. When you call in a prescription, just say, "Can I have my pills filled?" You can be sure the pharmacist will recognize your voice and know which medication you want. …

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