Magazine article The Spectator

Second Opinion

Magazine article The Spectator

Second Opinion

Article excerpt

Occasionally I walk home from the prison. Usually I take a taxi. Very rarely indeed do I drive; I don't much care for parking within a mile radius of an establishment from which car thieves are released daily.

I turned on the wireless and an unctuously sermonising Church of England voice emerged. 'We pray for our world,' it said, 'especially those parts of it afflicted with violence.' I thought for a moment that he was referring to the bedsits and housing estates near my home, as well as the casualty department of my hospital. But he wasn't, of course.

'We pray for the Middle East. We pray for the hostages, and for the hostage-takers.' I turned off the wireless with a gesture of disgust; you speak for yourself, I thought. Then I made up a little prayer of my own as I drove over the speed-bumps that make kerb-crawlers of us all.

'We pray for the burgled and the burglars. We pray for the mugged and the muggers. We pray for the safe-deposit box holder and the safe-breakers. We pray for the blackmailed and the blackmailers. We pray for the beaten wife and the wifebeaters. We pray for the murdered and the murderers.' In fact, we pray for just about everyone, the taxpayer and the tax-collector, the wall-cleaner and the graffiti-artist, the house seller and the estate agent, the debtor and the loan shark. 'Blessed are the vandals, for they shall inherit the telephone booths.'

Of course, I try to take the larger, all-compassionate view, to be as forgiving as the man who murdered his girlfriend and said, 'I've made amends, I don't hate her no more,' but try as I might, my prejudices keep breaking through. …

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