Magazine article Work & Family Life

I Want to Get along Better with My Father

Magazine article Work & Family Life

I Want to Get along Better with My Father

Article excerpt

Q I really liked your article on adult children and their parents (February issue). I have a wonderful, warm relationship with my mother but I've had difficulty connecting with my father. Any suggestions for getting along better with him?

-E.K., San F'rancisco

A Dr. Susan Newman, who wrote the article, says that most of us relate to one parent more than the other-and often it is the parent of the same gender.

"As we get older, we do feel a desire to connect to both parents," she says. "And you can get closer to a difficult or distant parent-even to a parent who was part of a messy divorce or was not always part of your life growing up."

To forge a stronger bond now, Dr. Newman suggests:

ARRANGE TO SPEND TIME with your father without the distraction of others. Encourage him to talk about his childhood. This could be a key to understanding him.

DURING A ONE-ON-ONE, you might learn things about your father that you were unaware of. It could be a stepping-off point for a renewed connection. …

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