Newspaper article The Evening Standard (London, England)

Diary of an Estate Agent

Newspaper article The Evening Standard (London, England)

Diary of an Estate Agent

Article excerpt

MONDAY

Mondays are always busy, as tenants have had all weekend to think about what'swrong with their flats and new flat-hunters have spent all weekend trawling the net.

However, I wish the phones wouldn't go mad before the kettle has boiled.

The email inbox is full: lots of enquiries, junk mail offering cheap Viagra,and dramas"my basement has flooded", "my boyfriend's a brute" and "the dog has eaten mycontract".

Where to start?

I began at the chewed contractthat was easy. The landlord, an old client, asked if he could have areplacement as his puppy had shredded the original.

Management is on to the flood, the Viagra is deletedthat left me with the brute of a boyfriend.

Or was he?

The girlfriend, a joint tenant, called early to get her side of the story in first.

She wanted him out of the two-bedroom garden flat as he was utterly beastly.

Then her cousin, a solicitor, called to insist that this monster must beremoved forthwith or legal action would follow.

Then her mother called from Frank- furt to say she would pay whatever it tookto get this man out of her darling's life.

By the time the beast of Pimlico managed to get through himself, the poor chapbegged to be allowed to leave.

Tuesday

We are delighted to have let a new [pounds sterling]2,000-a-week, five-bedroom house to abanker but feel apprehensive about his very demanding wife.

In size-six Chanel, with immaculate tan and faultless blonde hair, she willaccept nothing less than perfection.

The landscapers hadn't quite finished the garden. She pointed a manicured,polished forefinger at it and told me it must be dealt with immediately.

By contrast, we also showed a [pounds sterling]4,250-a-week house near the Houses of Parliamentto a delightful French couple.

They had brought along their children's nanny to be sure she was happy with herfuture room. …

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