Newspaper article Evening Chronicle (Newcastle, England)

Off the Cuff

Newspaper article Evening Chronicle (Newcastle, England)

Off the Cuff

Article excerpt

Byline: ADAM JUPP

I DON'T want to sound like a corny shopping channel advert for some kind of miracle herbal remedy but... Do you sometimes find yourself unable to carry out even the simplest of things? Do you occasionally lose the ability to carry out tasks well within your capabilities? If the answer is yes, then thank God because that means I am not the only one. This long-winded intro is leading up to a heartfelt apology to regular OTC readers who may have noticed a couple of errors last week.

If you didn't, then I'm going to shoot myself in the foot and bring them to your attention. And the reason I am doing so is that I have no reasonable explanation for what on earth was going on in my mind at the time.

Math's was always my weak spot and it has not been unheard of for me to mess up even the simplest of sums, ones that if I took a deep breath and thought about it for an extra second, common sense would tell me I'd got them wrong. Over the years it has been frustrating at times, like, for example, when I would go over my overdraft limit AGAIN as a student due to poor math's, rather than wanton spending, or when I've found myself 10p short for my Friday treat of a coronation chicken sandwich due to a daft miscalculation when throwing pennies into a charity tin.

But, when it came to writing last Thursday's column, it was the words that failed me. OK, brace yourselves... ERROR ONE. To re-cap, I was discussing my weekend looking after our two nieces, aged three and eight weeks. I told how after a quick plunge in the ball pool, we headed to the bouncy castle. Describing our short journey across the soft play centre, I said: "The youngster I had in toe..." In toe? In toe?!! What, am I, Gulliver all of sudden? Now, I do have significantly larger feet than the toddler concerned and she did tread on them a few times, but she was very definitely not in my toe. …

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