Newspaper article The Florida Times Union

A.M. Stir

Newspaper article The Florida Times Union

A.M. Stir

Article excerpt

Byline: JEFF BRUMLEY

A LETTER TO TERRY

STIRRER HAS FOUND A NEW LOVE

Terry Gross

Fresh Air

WHYY, Philadelphia

Dear Terry,

As you probably do not know, I have been madly in love with your voice since I started listening to your interview radio show, Fresh Air, in the 1980s. My feelings for you deepened even further in 2002 when you socked it to smut-mouth Gene Simmons, and yet again in 2003 when you showed what a whiner Bill O'Reilly really is. Before and since, you have conducted interviews that have made my heart and mind swell.

So it is with great difficulty, and a certain amount of embarrassment, that I must tell you that I have found another. You see, I received a GPS unit for my birthday and, as it happens, I have fallen head over heels, ga-ga in love with the female Britist voice that issues forth from it.

At first I had "American English" as the unit's voice, and your voice remained my one true (audio) love. But then I was playing with the settings and discovered a British accent was available. I selected that option innocently and with some degree of amusement. It turned out to be a fateful decision. For as I drove from Knoxville to Nashville recently, her intellectual-sounding, confident commands - such as "turn left in 1.5 miles" and "turn right then right . . . " - stole my heart like a thief in the night.

Terry, I want you to know that while I am no longer in love with your voice, it will continue to be my friend and confidant. I will remain faithful to your show as long as it remains on the air (which I hope is, like, foreverrrrr!). But the volume goes down the instant my beloved British babe issues an order to turn right, merge left or continue on this route for 100 miles.

Sincerely,

Your biggest fan,

Jeff Brumley

Jacksonville, Fla.

P.S. Do you have one of these GPS units?? They're totally amazing and stuff!

MEMO TO NFL

PLEASE LET US KNOW WHEN STUFF CHANGES

Hey NFL: I think you should start giving people a bigger heads up before Thursday-night play begins. See, because you didn't warn me, I didn't update my fantasy league settings in time, leaving me with an inactive QB and RB this week. …

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