Newspaper article Sunshine Coast Sunday (Maroochydore, Australia)

Facebook Gets on My Goat, I Mean Sheep

Newspaper article Sunshine Coast Sunday (Maroochydore, Australia)

Facebook Gets on My Goat, I Mean Sheep

Article excerpt

AM I the only person in the world who still doesn't have a Facebook site?

Seriously, every man and his dog seems to be spending time chatting with friends; friends of their friends; some girl they vaguely know from the pub last Friday night and the bloke who used to pull their hair and make them cry when they were in third grade at Goondiwindi.

It's like the whole world suddenly wants to be friendly and I, for one, find it a little disconcerting.

I have to ask myself, do I seriously want to get reacquainted with the girl who used to laugh at my pimples in high school?

Apart from hoping to find out that she's now packing the shelves at Coles at Quilpie, there's not much I have to say to her almost 30 years later, is there?

And, as a happily married man, do I really want to put myself out there for old girlfriends to find and mock mercilessly.

It is better for my wife to remain under the illusion I was a young stud than to learn the sad truth about my failings as a teenage heart-throb.

Actually, I really don't have a problem with people catching up with long-lost friends online but there are some other aspects of Facebook that annoy me a bit.

I mean, what's this about "poking" people.

Let me tell you, all hell would break loose if I walked up to someone in the street and "poked" them.

I know. I've tried it.

And don't get me started on throwing sheep at each other (seriously, they do it on Facebook).

Once again, what would happen if I walked up to you in the street and lobbed any sort of live animal at you (with the exception of guinea pigs that were specifically designed for throwing at other people)?

And from what I can make out, people with Facebook sites have an annoying habit of listing information about themselves, which they take for granted the rest of the world wants to know.

My wife has a Facebook site (I'm arranging for her to get professional help) and she'll put little messages like "Jan is . …

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