Newspaper article Evening Gazette (Middlesbrough, England)

More or Bore

Newspaper article Evening Gazette (Middlesbrough, England)

More or Bore

Article excerpt

THE column YOU write yourself! If you fancy a go at More or Bore simply send 400-500 words to the Editor, Evening Gazette, Borough Road, Middlesbrough or email: BUT BE PREPARED to write MORE... If you win the readers' vote you will get the chance to write for THREE WEEKS and pick up a special prize. Vote online on

We have a new entrant this week. Middlesbrough born and long suffering Boro supporter and season ticket holder, Geoff Pattison is a retired Agricultural Adviser. His hobbies include gardening, indoor bowls, music and writing, particularly poetry. Geoff has written over 600 poems and many short stories. More than ten of his books have been produced and sold to raise money for the Butterwick Hospice. Over pounds 25,000 has been raised to date.

I DON'T know what to do. I have always enjoyed Sunday lunch particularly when pork was on the menu, crispy crackling and apple sauce, absolutely delicious. I'm now worried, Swine Flu, why are we infected? The average Joe hasn't even seen a live pig never mind come into contact with one, it's a mystery. I have my own theory, it's because we eat pigs, that's how we are infected so for me until it has been proved otherwise pig products are off the menu.

Beef is also off the menu, Mad Cow Disease. I blame that for my current mental state. I'm as mad as a bloody hatter, well I must be to write this drivel.

And eggs full of salmonella, I've stopped eating eggs, fried, boiled or otherwise.

Fish, that was suppose to be good for you. In fact when I was a young boy it was mandatory, every Friday without fail fish was served, yuk. I wouldn't eat fish on a Friday now, it's not healthy. It's all this heavy metal in the water, it's all polluted you know. In fact I won't even listen to heavy metal music now in case I get infected. …

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