Newspaper article The Observer (Gladstone, Australia)

Nah Mate, It's Fair Dinkum!

Newspaper article The Observer (Gladstone, Australia)

Nah Mate, It's Fair Dinkum!

Article excerpt

HOLIDAYING with kids is always going to cost you one way or another.

No matter how well you budget or how much you manage to squirrel away prior to it, two things you can guarantee: one, you will return home a lot wiser, and, two, no matter what, you will still pull up into your driveway with the arse out of your pants.

Kids will find ways to spend money you didn't even know you had.

As you remember from last week, me and the tribe hit the big smoke of the Gold Coast and in particular Movie World.

You've probably heard the saying 'A licence to print money', well, I've found out there are only three way to get a licence to print money.

Firstly, play golf as well as Tiger Woods; secondly, get a job at the Australian mint, and thirdly, and from what I can gather, the best way is to open a theme park on the holiday strip.

Now they sound like a nice affordable holiday, even after you have convinced yourself that the $250 you have shelled out for one full day of excitement and adventure.

You know the spiel, just pay to get in and all the rides are free - sounds great, but let's get a few things straight: even if you went during an outbreak of swine flu on a non-school or public holiday and the bureau on meteorology had just announced a tsunami warning, you can be guaranteed the best you can hope for is 6-7 rides, the rest of the time will be spent in queues plotting your own death.

Yes, the entry fee is just the tip of emptying of my wallet iceberg.

See, apparently according to DOCS, I've got to feed my kids at some stage during the day, and this is where they get you.

So I think to myself what would be the cheapest food source that might resemble at least one of the five main food groups that won't blow my ever dwindling budget.

"I know, hotdogs, everyone likes hotdogs and surely they can't cost me that much".

Big mistake, you would reckon the buns must have been rolled in gold leaf for what they charged. …

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