Newspaper article The Florida Times Union

Celebrate 'Singles' Day'; Don't Let Valentine's Day Propaganda Get You Down When You're Unattached

Newspaper article The Florida Times Union

Celebrate 'Singles' Day'; Don't Let Valentine's Day Propaganda Get You Down When You're Unattached

Article excerpt

Byline: SARA CONRAD

Valentine's Day is Sunday, and no doubt you will be exposed to more than a fair share of messages about how you can and should find love.

But there are different kinds of love and the first and foremost love of your life can be you.

We, along with Bella DePaulo, author of "Singled Out: How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After" (St. Martin's Press, 2006) and the Living Single blog on Psychology Today, have provided some ways to get in tune with the love of your life - you - on Saturday.

Skirt! proclaims the day Singles' Day.

Just because you don't have a spouse or significant other doesn't mean you don't have relationships, and it sure as heck doesn't mean your life is loveless.

Celebrate this Singles' Day with the person who will be with you on Feb. 13 this year and will still be with you on Feb. 13 next year: yourself.

IDEAS TO CELEBRATE SINGLES' DAY ...

TAKE YOURSELF TO DINNER

DePaulo recommends this as a challenge to her students at the University of California at Santa Barbara. She said they often come back with stories about how fun it is. She says don't take a book or phone to distract you while you're eating. And don't cop out and go to a fast-food joint. Go to a real restaurant, where you have to be seated. "When you go out on your own you are making a statement and making it easier for other people [to do the same]," she said.

INVITE YOURSELF TO A MOVIE

Just as with taking yourself to dinner, people don't often do this alone. But why not? You get all the popcorn and soda to yourself, and you don't have to waste 10 bucks on a movie you would rather have slept through but your partner thought would be fun.

HAVE A FRIENDSHIP PARTY

Just because you don't have a spouse or significant other does not mean you don't have significant relationships. Celebrate those tonight by throwing a party for all your unwed friends and don't make setting them up with each other the objective. Make celebrating your singledom your reason.

OTHER SUGGESTIONS

DePaulo recommends thinking about the one thing you would rather be doing at your most stressful moment and do that on Feb. 13. If it is relaxing at home, then give yourself permission to do so. If you would rather go out for a night on the town, take a look below at some of the suggestions for local activities and events.

-- See "THE VAGINA MONOLOGUES" at UNF tonight. It benefits V-Day, the campaign to end violence against women. The money raised from the show will benefit the V-Day campaign and every attendee makes a difference. The monologues are all about different women's experiences being female. The performance is at the University of North Florida Fine Arts Center at Lazzara Hall at 8 p.m. Friday and Saturday. …

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