Newspaper article The Florida Times Union

T-U 2

Newspaper article The Florida Times Union

T-U 2

Article excerpt

HAYS, THE MAGNIFICENTLY INACCURATE

Well, your humble seer finally got a hot hand - then went out of town and missed a week. A 4-0 record in my last outing improved the season total to 34-41-1. It's still lousy, but another perfect week could put me in position to have a winning mark with a strong bowl season. Yeah, I know, keep dreaming.

- SMU (plus 9 points) at UCF: SMU's passing attack will give UCF trouble. I'll take the Mustangs and the points.

- South Carolina (plus 5) vs. Auburn: I like Steve Spurrier's team, but I can't see it keeping up with Auburn. Cam Newton seals the Heisman Trophy with a monster game. I'll take Auburn and spot the points.

- Nebraska (plus 4) vs. Oklahoma: It's sad, but I think the Big 12 will try to punish Nebraska in this game. I wouldn't be surprised if the Cornhuskers get called for a dozen more penalties than OU. The Sooners will cover.

- Florida State (plus 4.5) vs. Virginia Tech: The Seminoles match up well with the Hokies. I like FSU in the upset but will pocket the points for insurance.

HAYS' HEADLINES

With inspiration from the satirical website theonion.com, here are the top sports stories that just missed the paper this week. These are Hays' headlines, with an appreciated assist from the sports desk crew.

- Randy Shannon says firing will help Miami more than you will ever know

- Gator Bowl enamored with Florida's victory over Appalachian State

- Elin Nordegren denies busting Barack Obama's lip

- Burt Reynolds, Loni Anderson agree Derek Jeter's possible divorce with Yankees getting ugly

- Greater shower discipline leads to bowl berth for Vols

- To boost Heat's offense, Erik Spoelstra consults Steve Addazio

- Jimmie Johnson's car fetches $5 million stud fee

- Report: Jon Gruden leading candidate for Vanderbilt job

- Roger Goodell admits having Andre Johnson on his fantasy team

- MLB mourns passing of legendary umpire Enrico Palazzo

- NFL fines James Harrison $100,000 for not helping opposing quarterback up to his feet

2 CENTS

This is my gift to all the anti-recruitniks out there. …

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