Newspaper article Evening Chronicle (Newcastle, England)

Readers' Poems

Newspaper article Evening Chronicle (Newcastle, England)

Readers' Poems

Article excerpt

YO HO HO XMAS time is here again, every year the same Always in the cold and wet and I know who''s to blame He laughs a lot cause he''s fat and jolly He''d soon calm down if he sat on his holly His boots are black and his suit is red By the size of his belt he''s very well fed He could do with a shave and a haircut too And he smells a lot of reindeer poo He flies around in his magic sleigh, Doesn''t need sat nav to find his way Up the chimney kids send lists Parents panic and have 40 fits Credit cards go into meltdown He''s to blame the big red clown Let''s take a vote, Santa must go Bury him deep in the ice and snow The north pole''s the place to lose the fat man Mince up the reindeer to sell in a can It will be lip-smacking good Free-range organic dog food.

MARGARET RENWICK ARMCHAIR MOUNTAINEER AN armchair mountaineer Watching adrenaline junkies climbing with no fear Watching the TV screen Snow-covered peaks, glacial jewels that have to be seen Precarious, hanging from the mountain on ropes Slowly climbing up Everest''s slopes The route of mountaineering g re a t s Edmund Hilary, Sherpa Tensing in 1953 An armchair mountaineer I watch them on TV As the mountaineers go ever higher Close to the edge closer to the w i re Watching from armchair comfort Tension builds, nerves are fraught They sweat and strain No connection, not feeling their pain On the sofa here I lie As they climb ever so high I put the kettle on to boil Watching them sweat and toil Drinking tea from the comfort of the sofa An armchair mountaineer, a sofa loafer ANTHONY TODD, Wallsend, North Tyneside

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