Newspaper article Evening Chronicle (Newcastle, England)

It's Getting Unbearable for Last Four; PICK OF THE DAY WE LOVE DOCUMENTARY WE LOVE SOAPS

Newspaper article Evening Chronicle (Newcastle, England)

It's Getting Unbearable for Last Four; PICK OF THE DAY WE LOVE DOCUMENTARY WE LOVE SOAPS

Article excerpt

Bear Grylls: Mission Survive (ITV1, 9pm) 'ONLY four remain," Bear's voice booms out. Which makes it sound as if the rest of the contestants were picked off by lions, rather than just being voted off.

Jason Gardiner, Samantha Barks, Michelle Collins and Alex Scott are not in great shape. Their bodies are falling apart, they're bickering (ok, mainly Jason and Michelle), and are clearly wondering why they didn't just sign up for Celebrity MasterChef.

"We've not been tortured enough yet," laughs England footballer Alex, clearly a bit delirious as they are led to an estuary.

Bear tells them they have to build a raft and float it downstream - watching out for Bull Sharks. As the tide comes in, the risk of a shark attack increases. News of which does absolutely nothing to help them stay calm.

Once across the estuary, they have to build their own shelter.

And actually, they're all quite pleased to have put up their own little tents and get some kip (alone) for once.

That is until Bear's henchmen Meg and Scott run into the camp in the middle of the night screaming. "It's an emergency, get out," shouts Scott.

Yeah, whatever. There is no emergency. Bear just wants to test their navigational skills in the dark.

"I thought I was having a heart attack," says Michelle.

But it's about to get so much worse. The next morning Bear wants to teach them (by way of a personal demonstration) all about rectal rehydration.

Yep, pipe the fluids in via the back door, so to speak.

"Is this really happening?" mutters Jason.

"It's for your own growth," says the interminably enthusiastic Bear as he whips his pants down and gets on with it.

They can't believe what they're seeing, but we all know what's coming, and it ain't pretty...

| Samantha Barks musters a smile in Bear Grylls: Mission Survive WE LOVE DRAMA LINE OF DUTY (BBC2, 9pm) WELL, after the twists and turns of last week's horror show, quite frankly we're still in shock. First of all, Danny Waldron (Daniel Mays) fired three bullets into a suspect who had surrendered.

Then he bullied his team into covering it up. …

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