Newspaper article Evening Gazette (Middlesbrough, England)

Solo Cinema Trip Sees Me Star in a Farce

Newspaper article Evening Gazette (Middlesbrough, England)

Solo Cinema Trip Sees Me Star in a Farce

Article excerpt

Byline: gary bainbridge One man's struggle with the 21st century. Follow Gary on Twitter @Gary_Bainbridge or email him at gary.bainbridge@trinitymirror.com

ISPEND far too much of my life sitting down and staring at a screen, so I decided to go to the cinema, because it's good to get out of your comfort zone occasionally.

For the record, it was Black Panther I went to see, partly because I had heard it was good, but mostly so that I could indulge in one of my favourite activities - laughing at the people who leave before the mid-credits and end-credits scenes of Marvel movies. These are like people who leave five minutes before the end of a play, if such people even exist.

I chose to go alone, because nobody could - or, more likely, would - go with me. Going to the cinema alone is great, because you get to choose exactly which snacks you want to buy without engaging in serious and rancorous negotiations, and you get a full large drink to yourself, which is a brilliant move when you are forced to sit in one place for two and a half hours.

Anyway, I decided to go to an arthouse cinema, because I thought it would make me feel more grownup about going to see a film about a man who dresses up in a bullet-proof panther suit and flies spaceships in a society where women get to do cool stuff without anybody commenting on it. Unbelievable.

I fetched up at the box office and confidently asked for one ticket to see Black Panther.

"Just one?" asked the man behind the counter, impertinently, in my view. I tried not to look hurt. "Yes, just one," I said.

"Where would you like to sit?" he asked, "Front, middle, or back?" "Back," I said. It's the best place to sit.

"Just one person, back row?" confirmed the box office man. I took my ticket and marched off, like a perfectly normal solo cinemagoer.

After all, it wasn't as if anybody knew me there.

I walked straight into a couple of friends of my late mother. They greeted me warmly while looking over my shoulder to see with whom I was visiting the cinema. "I'm on my own," I explained. They looked at me sympathetically. "I do it quite a lot!" I explained. Somehow that did not reduce the intensity of their sympathetic glare. …

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