Newspaper article The Observer (Gladstone, Australia)

Long Campaign Ahead; OPINION: Federal Election Already Sucking Us Dry

Newspaper article The Observer (Gladstone, Australia)

Long Campaign Ahead; OPINION: Federal Election Already Sucking Us Dry

Article excerpt

Byline: Chris Calcino

REVOLTING images of a snake riddled with more than 500 bloodsucking ticks went viral on social media yesterday.

This poor carpet python had slid into a backyard water feature on the Gold Coast in an apparent effort to drown off the blanket of parasites feeding on its vital fluid.

They were everywhere, these entitled freeloaders - all curved fangs and engorged abdomens, glugging away, fat and lazy, spreading disease and itch until a brave herpetologist plucked them off and pickled them in a jar of metho.

While we're on the topic of federal politics, how about that week just gone?

The pong of an election is already hanging heavy a full four months out from the anticipated May polling date.

Things are getting weird.

Great White Dope

Senator Fraser Anning, aka Steven Bradbury of the upper house, is having his moment in the spotlight after billing taxpayers almost $3000 so he could go to an extreme right-wing rally in Melbourne.

Attended by the kind of savants who espouse the Anzac spirit while issuing Nazi salutes and sniffing their fingers, it garnered plenty of media attention for the former One Nation candidate, former Katter's Australian Party senator and now would-be party leader.

Gladstone-based Anning is capitalising on his notoriety.

Yesterday, newspapers published a notice of his application to register his own party, the Conservative Nationals. There has been no word yet from Australian Conservatives leader Senator Cory Bernardi but, with two parties so similarly titled, it could be very confusing for hard-right voters at the ballot box.

ScoMo's clodhoppers

Prime Minister Scott Morrison unwittingly became an object of derision after staffers turned a lovely family portrait into a blueprint for how not to use photoshop.

The PM was literally given two left feet by some touch-up novice who decided his shoes were too scruffy and needed to be replaced with plain white monstrosities straight out of a '90s hip hop video. …

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