Newspaper article The Evening Standard (London, England)

Why Caesareans Are Chic

Newspaper article The Evening Standard (London, England)

Why Caesareans Are Chic

Article excerpt


THE news that there has been a dramatic rise in Caesarean births in the UK will come as no surprise to anyone who has spent any time in the watering holes of fashionable London recently.

Pregnant girls-about-town swathe their perfectly formed bumps in size 14 Jemima Khan clothes and explain that they 're off to the Lindo Wing at St Mary 's Paddington in the morning for an elective Caesarean.Friends are entreated to come and visit them with the requisite bottle of Bolly:"I 'll be so bored in there,I 'll need people to chat to."

Doctors may well be encouraging this trend the word on the wards is that female doctors unanimously choose Caesareans for themselves while male surgeons like to plan their golf around reliable due dates but women of means are taking the Caesarean option every time.I have met expectant mothers who have flown into London from exotic locations especially for the operation,which they seem to regard rather as you would minor cosmetic surgery.

Husbands and children are not in attendance.The women who are "too posh to push "believe natural childbirth to be primitive,painful,frightening and dangerous.Not having a Caesarean is a sacrifice akin to going without botox,collagen or the hig-protein,low-carb Atkin 's diet:ie,only for the masses.

A Caesarean allows you to retain some semblance of composure in a situation that brings us unpleasantly close to nature, which is far too messy and to be avoided whenever possible.

Best of all,you escape the ghastly post-childbirth indignities that beset many women,such as incontinence and loss of muscle tone."I 'm doing it for my husband,"they say with an arch smile."Natural childbirth ruins your sex life,you know."

This attitude reminds me of the south of France where my first baby was born.After three hours of unremarkable labour I was rushed to the operating table for a Caesarean because of the presence of meconium in the amniotic fluid.I have since been told that this is not necessarily treated as an emergency in Eng

land,but in my smart private hospital in Nice they only needed the tiniest inducement to get out the scalpel. …

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