Newspaper article St Louis Post-Dispatch (MO)

Morning Briefing Eye Openers

Newspaper article St Louis Post-Dispatch (MO)

Morning Briefing Eye Openers

Article excerpt

Eye Drops:

The New York Yankees bullpen must have been in charge of holding the Red River in its banks.

Officials recently launched the cremated remains of GENE RODDENBERRY and TIMOTHY LEARY into space . . . rubbing them on the baseball hit by MAR K MCGWIRE at Tiger Stadium. Rather than putting foam on runways, airports across the country now are directing struggling airplanes to land anywhere in the National League Central Division. All things considered, the Pittsburgh Penguins would rather be feeding horses on GENE STALLINGS' farm. Which would you rather face - the Blues' power play or the middle of the Cardinals' lineup . . . or both? Easy, Skipper. Easy does it, fella. Sports Glossary: "Cablinasian" 1. The process whereby visitors to New York or Chicago accept the fact they're better off taking cabs wherever they go. 2. A cabbage dish, very popular in Asia. 3. A musical progression, created and perfected by CAB CALLOWAY. 4. A line of Norwegian cruise ships thought to have the most cabin space of any fleet on the ocean. 5. A name TIGER WOODS came up with to best describe his mixed background of one-fourth black, one-fourth Thai, one-fourth Chinese, on e-eighth white and one-eighth American Indian. During a taping for "The OPRAH WINFREY Show" on Monday, Woods said, "It does" bother him when people call him an African-American. "Growing up, I came up with this name: Cablinasian," he said. Thanks, But No Banks: Tiger has gotten a little taste of "Tablinasion" in recent days. That is, the British tabloids have started peeking into the personal affairs of the 21-year old Masters champion. The Sunday Mirror linked the talented linkster to model TYRA BANKS, the cover girl of the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue. And, as an aside, I think most men can relate to the indignation of being linked with Sports Illustrated swimsuit models. In a story that cited no sources - i.e., infinitely believable - the Mirror said Woods began dating Banks in December after they met at New York's All-Star Cafe. The newspaper also matched Woods with golfer KELLIE KUEHNE, who is a longtime friend. …

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