Newspaper article Pittsburgh Post-Gazette (Pittsburgh, PA)

Sister, Fiance Need Truce for Big Day

Newspaper article Pittsburgh Post-Gazette (Pittsburgh, PA)

Sister, Fiance Need Truce for Big Day

Article excerpt

DEAR NATALIE: My fiance and I are planning on getting married in September, and your advice on wedding invites last week made me think about a situation I am dealing with. My sister and fiance do not get along, and because of this, there has been a lot of tension in the family. I don't want any issues on my wedding day, so I told my mom I don't want to invite my sister. And now my mom is threatening not to come if my sister doesn't come. Not sure what I should do. Maybe it's better if they both aren't there? What do you think? - BAD SITUATION

DEAR BAD SITUATION: I'm sorry that your sister and fiance can't seem to find common ground. But by uninviting her, you are only going to create even more of a rift in the family, and you may regret it years later. Instead, tell your sister that you definitely want her to be a part of this special day, and that you hope that this occasion is the start of a new chapter for everyone.

If your fiance and sister are willing to sit down (and politely) talk to each other before the day, that would be ideal. Maybe they can squash this so that everyone can move forward. If that is a bad idea, then let your sister know that while she is invited to the wedding, it is under the assumption that she can control her emotions and accept the fact that you are choosing to marry the person you love, and that for this reason alone, she needs to support you.

DEAR NATALIE: I have a disability (I would rather not disclose the nature of it) and was wondering how to handle this when dating. Do I bring it up right when I meet someone? Do I wait and see? Does it even matter when it comes to relationships? - ABLE TO DATE

DEAR ABLE TO DATE: Dating is a tricky landscape to navigate, and people can be easily thrown off by the smallest issue. Because I don't know what kind of disability you have, I assume it falls into one of two categories: 1. visible disabilities or 2. invisible disabilities. If your disability is physical and visible (for example, perhaps you have mobility issues), it will be apparent to whomever is meeting you that this is the case. …

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