Newspaper article St Louis Post-Dispatch (MO)

QuirkOut! Many Unhappy Returns

Newspaper article St Louis Post-Dispatch (MO)

QuirkOut! Many Unhappy Returns

Article excerpt

How we hate returning things to the store. The nasty sales clerk reminds us we just missed the deadline. She barks, "I can't possibly take this back," as if we handed her rotten tomatoes.

And there are so many other unpleasant returns:

Returning to the scene of the crime when you go to your ex- boyfriend's house after a breakup to get your hair dryer and Girl Scout cookies.

Returning the compliment when your backstabbing co-worker says something nice about your presentation and you feel compelled to say something nice about her Frozen dolls.

Returning to the fold when Bethenny Frankel goes back to the "Real Housewives of New York" after her talk show tanks.

Instead of going crazy, find your sales receipts as we give you QuirkOut lessons on how to face many unhappy returns.

TAG, YOU'RE IT!

Once upon a time a woman was going to a black-tie party and wanted a Cinderella dress that was way beyond her budget. But she couldn't resist, so Polly bought the Michael Kors gown from a fancy store with a fancy price.

Her QuirkOut plan was to tuck the tags inside her strapless bra, be the belle of the ball and return the dress the next day before the clock struck midnight.

Flowing through the beautiful people at the party, all was going beautifully. Until the tags escaped from their hiding place and the hostess noticed.

"You forgot to the cut the tags out of your dress," the well- meaning hostess said as she pulled them off with the brute force of a fight on the Bad Girls Club.

Poor Polly had reached the point of no return. Our heroine always hoped she'd own a $1,000 gown, but not when living happily ever after meant eating Ramen noodles forevermore.

NO RETURNS OF THE DAY

Cyber shopping changed our lives. We love not driving to the mall and not parking and not schlepping packages home.

Sitting in our jammies while sipping a Pinot Noir, we have our way with the World Wide Web. …

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