Playing the Lying Game: Detecting and Dealing with Lies and Liars, from Occasional Fibbers to Frequent Fabricators

By Gini Graham Scott | Go to book overview

CHAPTER 5
Everyday Social Lies
Some lies are so common that many people don’t even consider them lies. They have become more like social conventions whereby people offer comments and opinions, make agreements about little things like plans to meet, and give excuses that aren’t exactly true. In turn, many others don’t take such statements seriously — maybe the person means them when saying them, or maybe not; such statements are more like social glue to many people.However, there are still some people who really do care and want to apply strict standards. They see such sloppy habits and imprecisions about the truth as a decline in manners and trust, and they distrust such people who are loose with the truth, even in everyday social situations.In other words, the people who tend to see these everyday social lies as not really lies or just as common social conventions tend to be the pragmatic fibbers, real Pinocchios, and frequent liars, whereas those who seek to avoid such lies are the real straight shooters and models of absolute integrity.These social lies fall into six main categories:
The lies that cover up feelings and opinions;
The lies to create a better image or appearance;
The little misrepresentations made to avoid or shorten undesired contacts.
The agreements made because it’s easier to say “ yes” when the real answer is “no”;
The excuses given to avoid activities;
The lies told to cover up forgetfulness and tardiness; and

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