The Fan: I Propose Flogging for Footballers Who Take off Their Socks

By Davies, Hunter | New Statesman (1996), September 6, 2004 | Go to article overview

The Fan: I Propose Flogging for Footballers Who Take off Their Socks


Davies, Hunter, New Statesman (1996)


So far, what do you think of it, then? The season, of course. So much has happened in such a short time.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

Two Premiership managers gone already--Paul Sturrock and Bobby Robson, with hardly time to warm the bench, throw a hairdryer across the dressing room, be given a vote of confidence by the board. Getting a million or so in compensation won't make up for the heartache and shame. Poor old Bobby. Just when he thought he was about to retire gracefully, in his own time.

Floods of Spaniards, arriving on every boat, onions round their necks, sorry, that's Frogs, stealing our women, displacing our lads. Who would have thought it just a season ago?

Even more amazing, three roast beefs are now with Real Madrid. Who would have thought it, etc. And Becks has had the same hairstyle for oh, it must be weeks now. Michael Owen looks v nervous. Will he cope or get even more tight-lipped? Or be back at the end of the season?

No new Brit teenage talent sighted so far. Shaun Wright-Phillips was last season's thrill, Wayne Rooney the season before. Where have they gone? In hiding, or smothered by that Spanish wave?

Best signing so far--Paul Dickov to Blackburn. A bargain at [pounds sterling]150,000. Most disappointing signing--Patrick Kluivert at Newcastle.

Paul Scholes retiring from England duties signified one thing: he is pissed off by Sven and his England management. At his age, his stage, would he have fallen out of love with playing for England if the team had been happy and successful?

The Premiership refs have got their act together at last--commercially. Don't you love those twee little advertisements on their dinky sleeves for Fly Emirates. They are now looking for sponsors to appear on every yellow card. Double price for red cards.

But boo to the new electronic, computer-driven advertising hoardings round Old Trafford. So annoying, distracting, now that they can move around. As bad as watching Spanish football. …

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