THE Bitch LIST; (1) Ranting: Jade Goody (above) Launched a Racist Outburst at Shilpa (2) out of Step? Penny Lancaster (3) Hells Bells: Marco Pierre White (4) Daggers Drawn: Gordon Ramsay (5) the Feud That Never Ends: Joan Collins (Left) and Linda Evans (6) Unhinged: Heather
Byline: CLAUDIA CONNELL
IT IS supposedly the season of goodwill, but try telling that to acelebrity with an axe to grind. The past 12 months have proved a busy year forbackstabbing and all-round bitterness. Here, CLAUDIA CONNELL looks back at thecelebrity catfights of 2007..
WE CAN always rely on reality TV to produce some classic bitchy moments andthis year didn't disappoint.
We kicked off 2007 with the now infamous Jade Goody/Shilpa Shetty showdown onChannel 4's Celebrity Big Brother. It started over a chicken stock cube: Shilpaclaimed she ordered them and Jade insisted she didn't. Jade told the Bollywoodstar: 'You're a liar and a fake. You're not in Neverland here, you're not noPrincess, you are normal so learn to live with it. You need a day in the slums.What's her surname anyway? Shilpa Cookamada? Shilpa Rockamada? Is it ShilpaPoppadom?' The ever-dignified Shilpa won the day and spoke for the nation whenshe told Jade: 'Oh, please learn some manners. You know what you need?Elocution lessons. This is you Jade, isn't it? This is your fame. Well, goodfor you.'
SHARON OSBOURNE wasn't too pleased when she lost her status as the only femalejudge on the X Factor in April. She laid into new recruit Dannii Minogue,claiming: 'She knows she is only there for her looks. It's not for hercontribution to the music industry, is it?' And Sharon didn't hold back whereother celebrities were concerned either. On Madonna, she said: 'I've met herand she's very cold and rude. All this buying babies stuffit's like she's buying a bloody handbag for God's sake!' And on Mick Jagger:'He's always crawling up some lord or lady's a**e on a Persian rug. He makes mesick.'
BRASH American former model Janice Dickinson didn't exactly bond with new agePR Lynne Franks when they appeared in I'm A Celebrity ... Get Me Out of Here!.
Janice said of Lynne: 'What a freak.
Don't make an enemy of me, you old shrew. I'm going to stab her in the middleof the night and steal her bed. I'm hungry and I'd like to fry up those big oldboobs.' Lynne accused Janice of being bossy, aggressive andquelle horreur! of not cooking the vegetables properly.
Katie Hopkins, in contrast, was on her best behaviour in the junglewhich is more than can be said when she was trying to land a job with Sir AlanSugar on The Apprentice earlier in the year.
On runner-up Kristina Grimes, she said: 'Whenever there is an issue, she alwaystries to cover her a**e.
It's a shame she doesn't apply the same principle with the skirts she wears.She's a snake and a complete pain and far too orange to ever be takenseriously.'
STRICTLY COME SPITEFUL
NO TV judging panel is complete without a camp and catty member. On Dancing OnIce, it was the turn of Australian Jason Gardiner, who said of Sky Newsanchorwoman Kay Burley: 'She's the oldest woman in the contest and she tries iton with all this cutesy charm.
'She has this painted-on smile which makes her look rather demented. Somebodymust have told her once that she had a big smile, but they omitted to say itwas also very ugly.' On TV newsreader Phil Gayle: 'There's something verysimple about him. Like the village idiot.' On Ulrika Jonsson: "She's like anold ironing board. It's like watching a pensioner on ice it's sobuttclenchingly awful for me to have to watch her every week.'
MEANWHILE, over on BBC1, the role goes to Strictly Come Dancing judge CraigRevel Horwood (left).
On contestant Penny Lancaster, Craig said: "She's arrogant. She thinks she'sbrilliant, but with her choice of outfits she looks like she's going to aswingers' party.' On Gabby Logan: 'She wears the pants in that marriage. She'dtread all over Kenny [Gabby's former rugby-player husband and fellowcontestant] to win. He tries, but he doesn't have much chance. He looks like agorilla.' On Letitia Dean: 'She needs to do some stomach crunches. …