HULLAW THERR CHINA; Beijing 2008 THE 29TH OLYMPICS ... Wan Ton Gary Ralston's Diary
Byline: Wan Ton Gary Ralston
THIS should be filed under "Dear pot, signed kettle" by someone who has thrown so many kilts on international sporting events the column should be sponsored by Hector Russell.
(Coming up tomorrow: Michael Phelps exclusive - I think my great-great granny might have come from Glenmavis).
Top Israeli newspaper Haaretz didn't so much take the biscuit as march off with the whole Tunnock's empire with its coverage of Phelps and co's 4x100metres freestyle relay win, under a headline that said, "Two Jews and a Black Man Help Phelps Fulfil Olympic Dream".
A snapshot of the report read, "When Garret Weber-Gale - who's Jewish, by the way - jumped in he trailed his Australian opponent by a hair's breadth."
It went on, "An amateur until the age of 20, Jason Lezak - a good Jewish boy from California - put on a great show."
As soon as Squid Boy touched the tiles I was on to Google, frantically typing, "Michael Phelps, Scotland".
I think I gave you a bum steer the other day in relating the tale of Yang Yijie, the schoolboy who travelled 1500 miles on roller skates to watch the Olympics.
Every time you pick up a newspaper here they're recording remarkable feats by their citizens in their attempts to honour the Games. Typically, a story in the China Daily will start, "Ji Gang,12, from a-back-of-beyond-province-no-one-has-ever-heard-of, has just arrived in Beijing.
"He made the 3000-mile journey across the Gobi desert wearing only a pair of flip flops and carrying just a two-litre bottle of diet Irn-Bru and a quarter of chopped pork for his pieces". …