A Kiss Isn't Just a Kiss; Where Should Schools Draw the Line between Normal Childhood Behavior and Sexual Harassment?

By Leland, John | Newsweek, October 21, 1996 | Go to article overview

A Kiss Isn't Just a Kiss; Where Should Schools Draw the Line between Normal Childhood Behavior and Sexual Harassment?


Leland, John, Newsweek


The national media had largely pulled out of Lexington, N.C., by the time Jeanie Buchanan squeezed her way into the middle-school auditorium last Monday night. For locals like Buchanan, the damage was already done. Since Sept. 19, when 6-year-old Johnathan Prevette kissed a classmate and was disciplined for sexual harassment, the town had become an object of national derision, a case of political correctness run amok. It was an easy target. A cute kid had expressed some affection. What did that have to do with sex or harassment? Support for Prevette poured in. He found a soulmate - and more media exposure - when PS 104 in Queens, N.Y., suspended 7-year-old De'Andre Dearinge for kissing a classmate and pulling a button off her skirt. (Both schools later decided the incidents did not constitute sexual harassment.) Over the weekend, Prevette rode on a float at a local car race, and walked off to exhortations of "Kiss me! Kiss me!" from grown women. Travesty averted; to the victim, the spoils.

Yet here in this small Southern town of 16,000 - hardly a launch pad for social revolution - there was still some sorting-out to do. What behavior is appropriate for elementary-school kids, and what for the administrators entrusted with their care? Buchanan and nearly 100 neighbors crammed into a hastily scheduled school-board meeting. The board conceded that its sexual-harassment policy needed some tinkering, to take into account the age of the kids. But most came to support the policy, not to mock it. Buchanan, a volunteer classroom helper, told Newsweek of a third grader who was sexually propositioned by another student. Jeff Check, whose daughter is in the seventh grade, asked, "How old does a girl have to be before no means no?"

Murky issue. As the Clarence Thomas hearings demonstrated, sexual harassment can be a swampy slog even when the participants are old enough to know better. In the last few years, the debate has spread beyond the workplace and into the nation's schools. And there things have gotten even messier. A 1993 study of boys and girls in grades eight to 11, conducted for the American Association of University Women, produced some alarming numbers: 81 percent said they had been sexually harassed. Commonly teachers did little to stop it. One third of those harassed said the problem began in the sixth grade or earlier. For these younger kids, the issue becomes especially murky: where do you draw the line between normal, developmental behavior and harassment, between flirting and hurting?

As with adult sexual harassment, we are increasingly asking the courts to decide. Two weeks ago a jury in California awarded $500,000 to Tianna Ugarte, who was taunted by a sixth-grade classmate; finding that the school had ignored her repeated complaints, the court ordered her former principal to pay $6,000 of the fine himself. The number of student complaints investigated by the federal government's Office for Civil Rights (OCR) is increasing steadily and now numbers about 200 cases a year. …

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