Truly, Madly, Deeply

Times Higher Education, March 27, 2014 | Go to article overview

Truly, Madly, Deeply


To: All University Staff

From: The Office of Jamie Targett, Director of Corporate Affairs

At last week's meeting of the University Marketing and Branding Committee, concern was expressed at the overuse of certain positive terms in the university's publicity material.

It seems that over 90 per cent of our individual undergraduate courses are described in the prospectus as either "exciting" or "innovative", while three-quarters of all our staff recruitment literature refers to the university as "outstanding" or "cutting edge" or "shaping tomorrow's world".

According to our brand consultants - Hovis, Twining and Shippam - there is a real danger that these terms might lose their potency through such overuse.

It was therefore decided to restrict usage through the establishment of an Evaluative Word Resource (EWR). From now on, all those who wish to describe any aspect of the university are required to apply to the EWR for their words and to pay the appropriate usage fee.

Here is the verbal stock currently held by the EWR, together with an up to the moment price guide.

Economy

The following single terms are available at just £2 each:

Exciting. Innovative. Exceptional. Unique. Dynamic. Outstanding. Visionary. Vibrant. Proactive. World-Class. Progressive. Cosmopolitan.

Club Class

Select any one of the following combinations or compile your own two-term combination for £3:

Exciting and innovative. Exceptional and unique. Dynamic and outstanding. Visionary and vibrant. Proactive and world-class. Progressive and cosmopolitan.

Premier Class

Select any of the following triple combinations or compile your own three-term combination for £5:

Exciting, innovative and exceptional. Unique, dynamic and outstanding. Visionary, vibrant and proactive. World-class, progressive and cosmopolitan.

Bargain Basement

The following "nearly new" terms are available for £1.50 each (while stocks last):

A beacon for creativity. …

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