--that is whatever part of it you assist me with: but I will try every corner first--Ah my dear Keats my illness has been a severe touch!-- I declare to God I do not feel alone in the World now you have written me that letter. If you go on writing as you 〈rep〉eated the other night, you may wish to 〈live〉 in a sublime solitude, but you will 〈n〉ot be allowed--I approve most completely your plan of travels and study, and 〈s〉hould suffer torture if my wants 〈in〉terrupted it--in short they shall not 〈m〉y dear Keats--I believe you from my soul when you say you would sacrifice all for me; and when your means are gone, if God give me means my heart & house & home & every thing shall be shared with you--I mean this too--It has often occurred to me but I have never spoken of it--My great object is the public encouragement of historical painting and the glory of England in high Art, to ensure these I would lay my head on the block this instant. My illness the consequence of early excess in study, has fatigued most of my Friends --I have no reason to complain of the lovers of Art, I have been liberally assisted; but when a man comes again with a tale of his ill health; they dont believe him my dear Keats; can I bear the thousandth part of a dry hesitation, the searching scrutiny of an apprehensi〈on〉 of insincerity; the musing hum of a sounding question; the prying, petty, paltr〈y〉 whining doubt, that is inferred from 〈a request〉 for a day to consider!-----Ah Kea〈ts,〉 this is sad work for one of my soul, & Ambition. The truest thing you ever said of mortal was that I had a touch of Alexander in me!--I have, I know it, and the World shall know it, but this is the purgative drug I must first take.--Come so〈o〉n my dear fellow--Sunday nobody is coming I believe--& I will lay 〈my〉 Soul bare before you--
Your affectionate Friend
B. R. Haydon
Address: John Taylor Esqre∣ Taylor ∣ Hessey's ∣ Fleet Street.
Postmarks: HAMPSTEAD and DE 24 1818.
My dear Taylor
Can you lend me 30£ for a short time?--ten I want for myself--and twenty for a friend--which will be repaid me by the middle of next Month--I shall go to Chichester on Wednesday1 and perhaps stay a fortnight--I am affraid I shall not be able to dine with you before I return-- Remember me to Woodhouse--