cruel, not to let me enjoy my youth! to wish me to be unhappy! You must be so if you love me--upon my Soul I can be contented with nothing else. If you could really what is call'd enjoy yourself at a Party--if you can smile in peoples faces, and wish them to admire you now, you never have nor ever will love me. I see life in nothing but the certainty of your Love--convince me of it my sweetest. If I am not somehow convinc'd I shall die of agony. If we love we must not live as other men and women do--I cannot brook the wolfsbane1 of fashion and foppery and tattle. You must be mine to die upon the rack if I want you. I do not pretend to say I have more feeling than my fellows-- but I wish you seriously to look over my letters kind and unkind and consider whether the Person who wrote them can be able to endure much longer the agonies and uncertainties which you are so peculiarly made to create--My recovery of bodily hea〈1〉th will be of no benefit to me if you are not all mine when I am well. For God's sake save me--or tell me my passion is of too awful a nature for you.
Again God bless you
No--my sweet Fanny--I am wrong. I do not want you to be unhappy--and yet I do, I must while there is so sweet a Beauty--my loveliest my darling! Good bye! I Kiss you--O the torments!
Address: John Taylor Esqre ∣ Taylor ∣ Hessey ∣ Booksellers &c. ∣ Fleet Street--∣ The first Bookseller on the left hand, ∣ from St Pauls, ∣ past Bridge Street, ∣ Black-friars
My dear Taylor,
In reading over the proof of St. Agnes' Eve since I left Fleet street I was struck with what appears to me an alteration in the 7th Stanza very much for the worse the passage I mean stands thus
"her maiden eyes incline Still on the floor, while many a sweeping train Pass by--"