A Collection of English Poems, 1660-1800

By Ronald S. Crane | Go to book overview

CHRISTOPHER ANSTEY
(1724-1766-1805)

The New Bath Guide1

Letter X

Taste and Spirit.--Mr. B-n-r-d commences A Beau Garçon

SO LIVELY, so gay, my dear Mother, I'm grown,
I long to do something to make myself known;
For Persons of Taste and true Spirit, I find,
Are fond of attracting the Eyes of Mankind:

What Numbers one sees, who, for that very Reason 5
Come to make such a Figure at Bath ev'ry Season!
'Tis this that provokes Mrs. SHENKIN AP-LEEK
To dine at the Ord'nary twice in a Week,
ho' at Home she might eat a good Dinner in Comfort,
Nor pay such a cursed extravagant Sum for't: 10

But then her Acquaintance would never have known Mrs. SHENKIN AP-LEEK had acquir'd a Bon Ton:
Ne'er shewn how in Taste the AP-LEEKS can excel
The Dutchess of TRUFFLES, and Lady MORELL;

Had ne'er been ador'd by Sir PYE MACARONI, 15

And Count VERMICELLI, his intimate Crony;
Both Men of such Taste, their Opinions are taken
From an Ortolan down to a Rasher of Bacon.

What makes KITTY SPICER, and little Miss SAGO,

To Auctions and Milliner's Shops ev'ry Day go? 20
What makes them to vie with each other and quarrel
Which spends the most Money for splendid Apparel?
Why, Spirit--to shew they have much better Sense
Than their Fathers, who rais'd it by Shillings and Pence.
What sends PETER TEWKSBURY every Night 25

To the Play with such infinite Joy and Delight?
Why, PETER's a Critic, with true Attic Salt,
Can damn the Performers, can hiss, and find fault,
And tell when we ought to express Approbation,
By thumping, and clapping, and Vociferation; 30
So he gains our Attention, and all must admire
Young TEWKSBURY'S Judgment, his Spirit and Fire.
But JACK DILETTANTE despises the Play'rs,
To Concerts and musical Parties repairs,

____________________
1
Published in 1766. Text of the third edition, 1766.

-925-

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